I can relate to so much of this, except the hopeless ending. You're smart as fuck, write really well, and are a free man. As DW says, that's all you need to get set up elsewhere. I've done it, several times, in various places. I know dozens of people who've done it with less going for them than you have. Mind-forged manacles, my brother.
Just go teach English in a foreign country. You can get started with no foreign language skills and just a college degree. Choose a place that's a balance of cosmopolitan and low cost of living - Prague, Taipei, Budapest, etc. - an English teacher there can sustain a middle class standard of living.
I lived overseas for about 10 years for various jobs. Never taught English myself but as an English-only expat naturally my social circles were filled with English teachers. There were a lot of (I say this with affection) slackers and people who otherwise dropped out of the rat race, because arbitraging Anglo-American cultural/economic hegemony gives you a huge amount of privilege that you can live comfortably on. You do get a pretty wide range of types of people but just the sheer experience of living overseas in convenient and walkable urban environments with great public transportation pretty much gives everyone a baseline level of cosmopolitanism and the conviction that American car-centric lifestyle and sprawl is just demonstrably inferior.
Another alternative is to work overseas as an in-house English editor/copywriter (NOT a translator) for a foreign corporation, which also pays a pretty livable middle-class wage. Typically in this type of role you would work with ESL corporate employees to help them craft their content so you don't strictly need foreign language skills. This is another job that's reasonably attainable if you can demonstrate writing skills (judging from this blog, shouldn't be a problem).
I spent my 20s abroad and live and work in the US now. Honestly I'm enough of a yuppie and sufficiently ambitious that my stint overseas began eventually sorted me into a very remunerative career path. While it's absolutely true that American "dynamism" is a real thing - it's why I get paid really well, foreign companies often seem years behind on operational best practices (in stuff like business technologies and process, not business fads), my workplace environment in the US is super motivated/fast-moving compared to sometimes sclerotic work cultures I saw abroad - I do massively miss the non-car-centric lifestyle and eclectic social circles I had while an expat. We would have been friends in Taipei or Budapest, here you would dismiss me as another tech bro with a Tesla =P.
Seriously though, look into it. The slackers and dropouts I knew abroad were all very content with their lives. In fact some of these places are cheap enough that you can go there with some savings and have a significant runway (depending on your savings) to just start looking for under the table work now and sort of your residency later. I wouldn't recommend it or anything but I do know people who have done this.
Thank you to all who replied. I truly was not expecting such a response, and am a bit overwhelmed. I'm always amazed that these quick one-offs seem to get the most responses ( I don't like writing about myself BTW).
Perhaps I'm naive, but don't I need at least a job offer and/or a work visa? Making myself unemployed and homeless, moving somewhere on the other side of the world where I don't speak the language, am not a citizen, don't know a single soul, and without remunerative work, and expecting it all to somehow work itself out seems insane to me, if not downright suicidal. Getting a job is the hardest, most difficult, most agonizing thing in the world. Just the thought of it makes me want to fire up my grill indoors. If it hasn't been like that for you, well, I don't know what to say; you've been blessed in your life. Is teaching English really a viable career option? Keep in mind, once I walk away from architecture, there is no going back.
Plus, I don't think I have that sort of courage. I'm sorry, it just seems impossible. People here have a lot more faith in me than I think is justified. I don't know what to say that's not going to sound like an excuse. I guess I've got a lot of thinking to do.
A few other quick notes. If you don't know, I live in Milwaukee where Harley Davidsons are made, hence the motorcycle situation. The town is taken over by motorcycle gangs in the summer, and everyone wants to show off their hobby. Trust me, this is not your typical engine noise we're talking about; it's on a whole other level. Another reason I want to get out of here. And I'm flattered people think this site is a viable financial option. You must think I have a lot more readers than I do ;-)
If I could do anything in the world? I'd hike the Grand Italian Trail from start to finish. After that, the Via Francigena. After that, the Camino de Santiago. After that, either the Sultan's trail or the Transcaucasian trail or Te Araroa in New Zealand.
I'm a brit living in turkey and make long distance trails. we work with some of the trails you name. World trails network. I was driven out of UK by Margaret thatcher, left computing, couldn't go back. focus on what u want to do and do it.
While it's *possible* to just drop everything and live somewhere cheap for a year while looking for work (again, contingent on your level of savings etc.) it's not necessarily the only way to do it if you are risk adverse. You can apply for a English teaching or editing jobs from the US with the understanding that you'll relocate if hired. You may not get a great English teaching job to start - many of the teachers I talked to started their teaching careers working for sketchier employers before getting the work experience that qualified them for work with established, visa/residency-sponsoring employers - but you will get paid enough to live comfortably in a low COL high Quality-of-Life locale.
Now is teaching English a "career"? Depends how you see it. I know some English teachers who have been doing it for a very long time and as they accumulate experience/certifications it becomes easy for them to acquire secure, regular jobs at more reputable employers. Working at McDonald's doesn't come with much room for career advancement - you're probably not going to be promoted from a franchise up to corporate - but that wouldn't really be a problem if McDonald's paid a reasonable middle-class wage, right? That's what English teaching can be like, I suppose, which is why it was such a good fit for the smart slackers I knew. Though I note that some of the more enterprising teachers I knew did go into business for themselves, or network among rich clientele to pick up a lot of high-paying private tutoring gigs, etc., so opportunities do exist for those who pursue them.
A more practical resource: www.tealit.com, for Taiwan jobs (I'm literally in Taiwan at the moment working remote for a month). Include your photo in any job applications (put it top right in your resume) and lean on any academic achievements. Both whiteness and academic prestige are rewarded by the teaching market here. Taiwan is just the job market I'm most personally familiar with; like I said, similar opportunities exist in other low COL high QOL locales.
Yep, I traveled a lot, really a lot (now less), and I have to say wherever I went I would never see/hear anything like the "Ghettoblasters", Harleys, Monster trucks and other truly American "specialities" that make so many peoples lives miserable here. Of course, in this our "me, me, me" society, this is not a surprise as apparently everybody has rights but no obligations in this country. Anyway.
"Perhaps I'm naive, but don't I need at least a job offer and/or a work visa? Making myself unemployed and homeless, moving somewhere on the other side of the world where I don't speak the language, am not a citizen, don't know a single soul, and without remunerative work, and expecting it all to somehow work itself out seems insane to me, if not downright suicidal." ~You said, "Maybe dying is the only way out." Wouldn't doing the former and stripping yourself of your ego/self be to the same effect?
Yeah man not to be mean but after writing all this and saying you can’t travel is a total copout. You are a writer on Substack, you can work anywhere as long as you can use WiFi (for only a minute or 2) to upload an essay. Also, traveling will give you a ton more material to write about. When I first got to İzmir, Turkey, I met a 75 year old retired American dude (he paid for his trip with his social security money) in a hostel I was staying at. We hung out a couple days before he went to an Eastern European country (because he had spent his 90 day Turkish visa up) that doesn't require a visa. Europe is expensive because of the Euro, but you can stay in said hostels for cheap. Some of the eastern European countries you don't have to pay in Euros. (I think Bulgaria is one and where my 75 year old friend went) I met young Europeans18-20 years old people in Morocco (had so much fun) and people my age 47 to 50+. You meet all kinds of cool people from everywhere in Europe, Australia etc. and if you don't like a certain place or the people you meet at a hostel, you just move to a new one. My advice is don't preplan your trip. Just write done some countries and places in those countries and meander. On the whim decide when to stay somewhere and when to move on. Like I said about meeting people, sometimes you meet someone you didn't know you shared anything with and you decide to take little adventures with them. You can stay in Europe just being an American citizen, for 90 days within a rolling 180 day span. You jump out of Europe (stop your visa count) and go to Morocco (1 US $ is 10 Moroccan Dirham) a country a US citizen doesn't need a visa at all. Turkey (1 US $ is 16.96 Liras) where I live now with my Turkish wife a I met in Izmir. You do need a visa but you can get it online in like 24-72 hours that lasts for 90 days. Before I met my wife I was planning on going east. Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam, Laos and all the island nations are cheap asssss crap. And do like Chris Ryan and get your teeth done in Thailand. Also I have never been to South America I am sure there are American friendly and very inexpensive countries down there. Also like Chris, who was just in Georgia, (very cheap) I met some young travelers that were there and loved it and said it was American friendly also. I am obviously not a good writer and I am all over the place with the timeline but I think you understand. Now get a notepad, write down some countries and buy a plane ticket, after looking for a ticket back to America for a couple month stay I couldn't find a flight until September that was $500, currently they are $1,000+ for July and August. This would give you time to get things together before you leave. Maybe you can set up an Airbnb at your American home and use that to help pay your bills and fund your trip. The longer you wait the older you get and the more chance you give your body time to break down. Fly on brother fly on...
"Americans act like boors and louts" -- you can expand this part of an already amazing & excellent rant on the state of America. I am 64 & can hardly control my vigorous agreement! It has always been dystopian, but more so now than ever! Americans are never more boorish than when reciting what they have been taught by the cable news channel they favor (usually, Fox/OAN/Newsmax or MSNBC). These opposite "opinions" overlap more than you might think, ironically, and are always spouted unidirectionally, loudly, angrily and as if they are original, despite the wording being nearly EXACT in every instance.
For example, ask someone about high gas prices or Iran or the US versus the UN.
If they are on the "right" they will tell you "AOC is stupid" and "Biden is senile"
If they are on the left they will tell you that "Trump is a fascist" and "Renewables will save us"
Like parrots.
And despite the paucity of research or original thought, they will scream these bromides as truths.
I live in Europe (France) and it seems that you are mostly stuck in your mind. I deeply resonate with your pain but if you are willing to shake your habits and take risks, I'm sure you can totally come to Europe. Sure, it might not work, but it would still be better than staying where you are. I don't know what your job is, but you can look for opportunities in Europe. As other people said, you can teach english, or you can just sell what you have, and come with your backpack and enough money to survive until you find something. I can't assure you that you will find a safe and well paid place, but I can assure you that you CAN escape.
As a side note, I want to say that european cities are also full of problems. I fled the city to live in the countryside with like minded people. But in Europe, in cities, you can certainly find way more "human" people than in the states. I wish you the best. Don't hesitate if you have questions about Europe.
And this is my blog (in french), you can contact me through it anytime if you have questions about Europe or France : http://lespagesdenomic.blogspot.com/
As a foreigner who moved to the so called "land of freedom and democracy" when i was 18 yo after living under communism for all my life, I can totally agree and understand. Excellent article that touches upon many points and explains them adequately and succulently.
We share most of the same sentiments. Come down south. Get a little land, grow a little food, play in the woods. You'll feel better. Just don't come to Kentucky. Too many people are starting to come here. That's why it's so good, you can get out in the middle of nowhere pretty easy.
Some of us who feel similarly, rather than move to a different country, find others here who are living differently. See https://www.thefec.org/ for example. I lived in one of those communes for years in my 20s, and it totally put me on a better course in life. Good luck!
i agree with many of your complaints which also smack of over-generaliztion. i have heard about an "army'' of more than 2 million people -- mostly between 17-47 -- who don't work for money but for the necessities --food and shelter; who are living as harmoniously as possible in and with nature and fellow creatures. i left the usa when i was 65 (14 years ago) for mostly the same reasons that you discuss. it's easy to do...buy a ticket; go someplace you know someone (or not).
"meditations on shame and escape: mediate with shame; escape my friend, escape, and may the angels be your guides."
I'm from Hawaii but have been living in Tokyo for 17 years. I won't go into a lot of detail, there are lots of YouTube videos and articles, but Japan is the antithesis of the US. I will give just one example: the US "health care" system is cruel, extractive, and a sham. Most of my conception of what the US has become relies on media. I learned long ago that "bait words" like "allegedly, should, seems, etc." are synomyms for "don't know". I often look at foreign media sites to see what's really important in the world, or to see what other countries think about the US. Hint: they really don't care.
I always contact friends still living in the US to confirm my fears, and they all agree. After Donaldae Trumpescu was elected, it was game over, the ultimate American orthodox "I con".
"You can't base a society around competitive individualism—it simply doesn't work. Competition is not a social glue; it's a solvent, and we’re increasingly coming apart at the seams." Brilliantly put!
There is some great advice in this comment section. I have no advice to offer, except to echo that mindset?/fear?/introversion? might be at play. No judgement whatsoever, mind you (I'm too scared to put my contact info on the Tangentially Speaking FacilMap - ha!), but think about what you CAN do instead of what you can't. I'm sure there are a number of subscribers who would be willing to pay you for the high-quality work you put out and help enable you to live the dream!
The Tangentially Speaking/Civilized to Death/Chris Ryan circle is full of inspiration.
I don’t think you are alone in feeling this way or even in having felt this way as a child. Even so, I am amazed at the degree to which so many people around the world aspire to an “American” way of life. A life that includes facets mostly unknown to them like violent crime or grinding poverty amidst nearly absolute social isolation. Perhaps they are bewitched by the Hollywood version of America. A country that never existed.
To be fair my neighbors in the deeply rural area where I live probably feel they also woke up in a foreign land. A land with little use for their skills and a distinct distaste for their subculture, a distaste that I admit sharing. They are confronted at every turn by insurmountable barriers and oddities. From heightened educational requirements for jobs to strange people and languages, their world all but vanished in less than a generation. Gone are the days of getting through high school and into a good paying industrial job and maybe a house, boat, couple trucks and a ramshackle summer camp on a lake. Now they work gigs for people who hate them and, yeah, hate is the right word here. Snowmobiles, ATVs, 4-wheel drive trucks, etc. all became too expensive and now they are coming for the guns. Or so the paranoid story rolls out.
I was in the military for four years starting in the late 80s. Definitely a new vibe after the second Gulf War. When I was in the military, most soldiers were forbidden to wear camouflage, BDUs, off post unless they were on the way to, or from, home. I’d say people treated us slightly worse than the average bloke, certainly not better. Soldier worship is an odd twist for a nation that really did look at military service as a citizen-solider sort of thing. No more. Yeah, I see that.
Without looking up stats and going wholly on personal experience I’d say that life is much less violent than when I was growing up. At least during the 80s and early 90s life seemed grim violence wise. These days there is more violent rhetoric and personal animosity than actual violence. My hope is that this generalized paranoia and hostility won’t turn into the sort of violent crime that plagued my childhood in the deep south. Where I grew up violence was banal something to avoid if you could but, meh, it was going to happen. That’s not true now. Sure, we have school shootings but teachers don’t tell you to “take your fights off campus” as they did when I was a child. The norm has changed for the better but I worry that this new norm is hanging by a thread as the constant fear and hostility ratchet up.
I was just noticing how much junk food there is everywhere. In fact, I discovered that I go to the “health food” store solely to buy junk food. That is almost all they sell. It is labeled “organic” and comes from exotic locales but all of it is sweet, salty, fatty, etc… junk pure and simple. That trend has been ongoing all my life but I do think there was a sweet spot when high quality food was available after a period of mostly better things through science processed junk. That was about late 90s to mid-2000s.
Anti-intellectualism and a nearly complete inability for self-reflection seems increasingly normal. As a child, I met plenty of adult working class intellectuals. People who contemplated themselves and the world deeply, read widely and were open to new ideas even as while holding down dull working class jobs requiring little formal education. Many of them were part of the local Society for Creative Anachronism or played very detailed historically based roleplaying games among other pastimes I never run into anymore e.g. learning Esperanto to speak with someone on HAM radio. Never see people like that now, they must be out there though. I see intellectuals at the university where I work, professional intellectuals, and then there are the masses of bored, hostile, uninterested humanity.
Lack of ability to sit comfortably with ambiguity is also common. I see it in the undergrads I teach who want to take an historical idea and either adopt it or toss it without spending any time looking at the strengths, weaknesses and personalities involved. Sitting with the ambiguity seems to make them anxious or even angry.
Noisy cars are everywhere. In rural Maine we have the roaring monster trucks and ATVs that run night and day including intrusions into yards and driveways if not confronted. All driving nowhere, just milling about doing as much damage to the road and environment as possible. When confronted, I find most of them so high or drunk they can barely put three words together. These nuts existed in my childhood but were relegated to fringe areas now they are everywhere rural, urban, suburban… all over.
I lived in S. Korea and I’d say they are every bit as committed to work, children and getting ahead but sans monster trucks, gun worship, constant hostility and actual violence.
In my view socialization is everything, people are everything. With socialized people anything is possible. The U.S. does an awful job at socialization because we are apparently fundamentally opposed to it. Many of our institutions by design or otherwise create predatory individualists. The cult of individualism seems to be the order of the day right, left and center of the political spectrum. If some collective interest is acknowledged it is usually in the form of nationalism or a zero sum struggle between opposed and yet perhaps overlapping cultural identities. Communists and socialists we are not. Nor, despite the rhetoric, do I think we are Anarchists with any relationship to the great trends in historical Anarchism.
One question I have is why all the violence and hostility. I have been in war zones, actual contested turf, that I felt than locations in the U.S.. I struggle to explain why most of my neighbors are angry and armed 24/7. The actual rate of violence here is actually quite low and most gun violence is accidental or self-directed albeit there is a lot of that. As a Marxist I look at economic issues and at systems of oppression but I remain mystified. Poverty is part of it but many of them are at least as wealthy as I am and their hostility is always aimed at each other and rarely contemplates bosses or elites. Why are they angry all the time? I have seen no academic answer that makes sense on the ground. Life would be relatively good, even without economic change, if the people around me were just nicer or at least not aggressively awful.
For a pick me up try watching episodes of Old Enough on Netflix. Toddlers doing errands in busy cities and rural environments without much fear or danger. https://www.netflix.com/title/81506279
The show is clearly contrived but I have lived in places where this would have been possible or at least someone would have picked up the toddler and delivered him or her safely home before things got out of hand. I believe this world is possible right here where I live but to get there the U.S. needs to address the horror that we have co-created. A world unsafe and unpleasant for fully capable adults much less toddlers. We will not be able to organize ourselves into a working civil society if we continue to accept and co-create an environment that is hostile, paranoid and antisocial.
I welcome the recent trend in labor organizing and hope this is a sign of change. The world can be different and better, it is different in other places and was different here in the past. Some trends have been good but as Americans we need to accept that fact that we are not yet creating the sorts of environments we want to live in. What environment will we create and accept? A world where toddlers safely run errands and deal with strangers in complex social environments or a predatory world of armed individuals. I still believe a better world is possible I lived there not that long ago in the U.S. and Asia.
I can relate to so much of this, except the hopeless ending. You're smart as fuck, write really well, and are a free man. As DW says, that's all you need to get set up elsewhere. I've done it, several times, in various places. I know dozens of people who've done it with less going for them than you have. Mind-forged manacles, my brother.
Just go teach English in a foreign country. You can get started with no foreign language skills and just a college degree. Choose a place that's a balance of cosmopolitan and low cost of living - Prague, Taipei, Budapest, etc. - an English teacher there can sustain a middle class standard of living.
I lived overseas for about 10 years for various jobs. Never taught English myself but as an English-only expat naturally my social circles were filled with English teachers. There were a lot of (I say this with affection) slackers and people who otherwise dropped out of the rat race, because arbitraging Anglo-American cultural/economic hegemony gives you a huge amount of privilege that you can live comfortably on. You do get a pretty wide range of types of people but just the sheer experience of living overseas in convenient and walkable urban environments with great public transportation pretty much gives everyone a baseline level of cosmopolitanism and the conviction that American car-centric lifestyle and sprawl is just demonstrably inferior.
Another alternative is to work overseas as an in-house English editor/copywriter (NOT a translator) for a foreign corporation, which also pays a pretty livable middle-class wage. Typically in this type of role you would work with ESL corporate employees to help them craft their content so you don't strictly need foreign language skills. This is another job that's reasonably attainable if you can demonstrate writing skills (judging from this blog, shouldn't be a problem).
I spent my 20s abroad and live and work in the US now. Honestly I'm enough of a yuppie and sufficiently ambitious that my stint overseas began eventually sorted me into a very remunerative career path. While it's absolutely true that American "dynamism" is a real thing - it's why I get paid really well, foreign companies often seem years behind on operational best practices (in stuff like business technologies and process, not business fads), my workplace environment in the US is super motivated/fast-moving compared to sometimes sclerotic work cultures I saw abroad - I do massively miss the non-car-centric lifestyle and eclectic social circles I had while an expat. We would have been friends in Taipei or Budapest, here you would dismiss me as another tech bro with a Tesla =P.
Seriously though, look into it. The slackers and dropouts I knew abroad were all very content with their lives. In fact some of these places are cheap enough that you can go there with some savings and have a significant runway (depending on your savings) to just start looking for under the table work now and sort of your residency later. I wouldn't recommend it or anything but I do know people who have done this.
You are really out-of-date on how the rest of the world views Americans post-Trump.
Great response. I was an in house translator myself.
Thank you to all who replied. I truly was not expecting such a response, and am a bit overwhelmed. I'm always amazed that these quick one-offs seem to get the most responses ( I don't like writing about myself BTW).
Perhaps I'm naive, but don't I need at least a job offer and/or a work visa? Making myself unemployed and homeless, moving somewhere on the other side of the world where I don't speak the language, am not a citizen, don't know a single soul, and without remunerative work, and expecting it all to somehow work itself out seems insane to me, if not downright suicidal. Getting a job is the hardest, most difficult, most agonizing thing in the world. Just the thought of it makes me want to fire up my grill indoors. If it hasn't been like that for you, well, I don't know what to say; you've been blessed in your life. Is teaching English really a viable career option? Keep in mind, once I walk away from architecture, there is no going back.
Plus, I don't think I have that sort of courage. I'm sorry, it just seems impossible. People here have a lot more faith in me than I think is justified. I don't know what to say that's not going to sound like an excuse. I guess I've got a lot of thinking to do.
A few other quick notes. If you don't know, I live in Milwaukee where Harley Davidsons are made, hence the motorcycle situation. The town is taken over by motorcycle gangs in the summer, and everyone wants to show off their hobby. Trust me, this is not your typical engine noise we're talking about; it's on a whole other level. Another reason I want to get out of here. And I'm flattered people think this site is a viable financial option. You must think I have a lot more readers than I do ;-)
If I could do anything in the world? I'd hike the Grand Italian Trail from start to finish. After that, the Via Francigena. After that, the Camino de Santiago. After that, either the Sultan's trail or the Transcaucasian trail or Te Araroa in New Zealand.
I'm a brit living in turkey and make long distance trails. we work with some of the trails you name. World trails network. I was driven out of UK by Margaret thatcher, left computing, couldn't go back. focus on what u want to do and do it.
While it's *possible* to just drop everything and live somewhere cheap for a year while looking for work (again, contingent on your level of savings etc.) it's not necessarily the only way to do it if you are risk adverse. You can apply for a English teaching or editing jobs from the US with the understanding that you'll relocate if hired. You may not get a great English teaching job to start - many of the teachers I talked to started their teaching careers working for sketchier employers before getting the work experience that qualified them for work with established, visa/residency-sponsoring employers - but you will get paid enough to live comfortably in a low COL high Quality-of-Life locale.
Now is teaching English a "career"? Depends how you see it. I know some English teachers who have been doing it for a very long time and as they accumulate experience/certifications it becomes easy for them to acquire secure, regular jobs at more reputable employers. Working at McDonald's doesn't come with much room for career advancement - you're probably not going to be promoted from a franchise up to corporate - but that wouldn't really be a problem if McDonald's paid a reasonable middle-class wage, right? That's what English teaching can be like, I suppose, which is why it was such a good fit for the smart slackers I knew. Though I note that some of the more enterprising teachers I knew did go into business for themselves, or network among rich clientele to pick up a lot of high-paying private tutoring gigs, etc., so opportunities do exist for those who pursue them.
A more practical resource: www.tealit.com, for Taiwan jobs (I'm literally in Taiwan at the moment working remote for a month). Include your photo in any job applications (put it top right in your resume) and lean on any academic achievements. Both whiteness and academic prestige are rewarded by the teaching market here. Taiwan is just the job market I'm most personally familiar with; like I said, similar opportunities exist in other low COL high QOL locales.
Yep, I traveled a lot, really a lot (now less), and I have to say wherever I went I would never see/hear anything like the "Ghettoblasters", Harleys, Monster trucks and other truly American "specialities" that make so many peoples lives miserable here. Of course, in this our "me, me, me" society, this is not a surprise as apparently everybody has rights but no obligations in this country. Anyway.
"Perhaps I'm naive, but don't I need at least a job offer and/or a work visa? Making myself unemployed and homeless, moving somewhere on the other side of the world where I don't speak the language, am not a citizen, don't know a single soul, and without remunerative work, and expecting it all to somehow work itself out seems insane to me, if not downright suicidal." ~You said, "Maybe dying is the only way out." Wouldn't doing the former and stripping yourself of your ego/self be to the same effect?
Yeah man not to be mean but after writing all this and saying you can’t travel is a total copout. You are a writer on Substack, you can work anywhere as long as you can use WiFi (for only a minute or 2) to upload an essay. Also, traveling will give you a ton more material to write about. When I first got to İzmir, Turkey, I met a 75 year old retired American dude (he paid for his trip with his social security money) in a hostel I was staying at. We hung out a couple days before he went to an Eastern European country (because he had spent his 90 day Turkish visa up) that doesn't require a visa. Europe is expensive because of the Euro, but you can stay in said hostels for cheap. Some of the eastern European countries you don't have to pay in Euros. (I think Bulgaria is one and where my 75 year old friend went) I met young Europeans18-20 years old people in Morocco (had so much fun) and people my age 47 to 50+. You meet all kinds of cool people from everywhere in Europe, Australia etc. and if you don't like a certain place or the people you meet at a hostel, you just move to a new one. My advice is don't preplan your trip. Just write done some countries and places in those countries and meander. On the whim decide when to stay somewhere and when to move on. Like I said about meeting people, sometimes you meet someone you didn't know you shared anything with and you decide to take little adventures with them. You can stay in Europe just being an American citizen, for 90 days within a rolling 180 day span. You jump out of Europe (stop your visa count) and go to Morocco (1 US $ is 10 Moroccan Dirham) a country a US citizen doesn't need a visa at all. Turkey (1 US $ is 16.96 Liras) where I live now with my Turkish wife a I met in Izmir. You do need a visa but you can get it online in like 24-72 hours that lasts for 90 days. Before I met my wife I was planning on going east. Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam, Laos and all the island nations are cheap asssss crap. And do like Chris Ryan and get your teeth done in Thailand. Also I have never been to South America I am sure there are American friendly and very inexpensive countries down there. Also like Chris, who was just in Georgia, (very cheap) I met some young travelers that were there and loved it and said it was American friendly also. I am obviously not a good writer and I am all over the place with the timeline but I think you understand. Now get a notepad, write down some countries and buy a plane ticket, after looking for a ticket back to America for a couple month stay I couldn't find a flight until September that was $500, currently they are $1,000+ for July and August. This would give you time to get things together before you leave. Maybe you can set up an Airbnb at your American home and use that to help pay your bills and fund your trip. The longer you wait the older you get and the more chance you give your body time to break down. Fly on brother fly on...
"Americans act like boors and louts" -- you can expand this part of an already amazing & excellent rant on the state of America. I am 64 & can hardly control my vigorous agreement! It has always been dystopian, but more so now than ever! Americans are never more boorish than when reciting what they have been taught by the cable news channel they favor (usually, Fox/OAN/Newsmax or MSNBC). These opposite "opinions" overlap more than you might think, ironically, and are always spouted unidirectionally, loudly, angrily and as if they are original, despite the wording being nearly EXACT in every instance.
For example, ask someone about high gas prices or Iran or the US versus the UN.
If they are on the "right" they will tell you "AOC is stupid" and "Biden is senile"
If they are on the left they will tell you that "Trump is a fascist" and "Renewables will save us"
Like parrots.
And despite the paucity of research or original thought, they will scream these bromides as truths.
This is not well thought-out. Besides "Renewables will save us", nothing you mentioned is false.
I live in Europe (France) and it seems that you are mostly stuck in your mind. I deeply resonate with your pain but if you are willing to shake your habits and take risks, I'm sure you can totally come to Europe. Sure, it might not work, but it would still be better than staying where you are. I don't know what your job is, but you can look for opportunities in Europe. As other people said, you can teach english, or you can just sell what you have, and come with your backpack and enough money to survive until you find something. I can't assure you that you will find a safe and well paid place, but I can assure you that you CAN escape.
As a side note, I want to say that european cities are also full of problems. I fled the city to live in the countryside with like minded people. But in Europe, in cities, you can certainly find way more "human" people than in the states. I wish you the best. Don't hesitate if you have questions about Europe.
And this is my blog (in french), you can contact me through it anytime if you have questions about Europe or France : http://lespagesdenomic.blogspot.com/
maybe something here will assist you: https://www.youtube.com/user/frostedmucus/playlists
peace in your way
As a foreigner who moved to the so called "land of freedom and democracy" when i was 18 yo after living under communism for all my life, I can totally agree and understand. Excellent article that touches upon many points and explains them adequately and succulently.
We share most of the same sentiments. Come down south. Get a little land, grow a little food, play in the woods. You'll feel better. Just don't come to Kentucky. Too many people are starting to come here. That's why it's so good, you can get out in the middle of nowhere pretty easy.
Some of us who feel similarly, rather than move to a different country, find others here who are living differently. See https://www.thefec.org/ for example. I lived in one of those communes for years in my 20s, and it totally put me on a better course in life. Good luck!
What's a smart guy like me doin' on a planet like this?
i agree with many of your complaints which also smack of over-generaliztion. i have heard about an "army'' of more than 2 million people -- mostly between 17-47 -- who don't work for money but for the necessities --food and shelter; who are living as harmoniously as possible in and with nature and fellow creatures. i left the usa when i was 65 (14 years ago) for mostly the same reasons that you discuss. it's easy to do...buy a ticket; go someplace you know someone (or not).
"meditations on shame and escape: mediate with shame; escape my friend, escape, and may the angels be your guides."
I'm from Hawaii but have been living in Tokyo for 17 years. I won't go into a lot of detail, there are lots of YouTube videos and articles, but Japan is the antithesis of the US. I will give just one example: the US "health care" system is cruel, extractive, and a sham. Most of my conception of what the US has become relies on media. I learned long ago that "bait words" like "allegedly, should, seems, etc." are synomyms for "don't know". I often look at foreign media sites to see what's really important in the world, or to see what other countries think about the US. Hint: they really don't care.
I always contact friends still living in the US to confirm my fears, and they all agree. After Donaldae Trumpescu was elected, it was game over, the ultimate American orthodox "I con".
Thanks to C. Mulligan for his affirmation.
"You can't base a society around competitive individualism—it simply doesn't work. Competition is not a social glue; it's a solvent, and we’re increasingly coming apart at the seams." Brilliantly put!
There is some great advice in this comment section. I have no advice to offer, except to echo that mindset?/fear?/introversion? might be at play. No judgement whatsoever, mind you (I'm too scared to put my contact info on the Tangentially Speaking FacilMap - ha!), but think about what you CAN do instead of what you can't. I'm sure there are a number of subscribers who would be willing to pay you for the high-quality work you put out and help enable you to live the dream!
The Tangentially Speaking/Civilized to Death/Chris Ryan circle is full of inspiration.
Very eloquently put.
It's been a few years since we last spoke. Would you like to come on the show and share these observations?
—J,
YAA
I don’t think you are alone in feeling this way or even in having felt this way as a child. Even so, I am amazed at the degree to which so many people around the world aspire to an “American” way of life. A life that includes facets mostly unknown to them like violent crime or grinding poverty amidst nearly absolute social isolation. Perhaps they are bewitched by the Hollywood version of America. A country that never existed.
To be fair my neighbors in the deeply rural area where I live probably feel they also woke up in a foreign land. A land with little use for their skills and a distinct distaste for their subculture, a distaste that I admit sharing. They are confronted at every turn by insurmountable barriers and oddities. From heightened educational requirements for jobs to strange people and languages, their world all but vanished in less than a generation. Gone are the days of getting through high school and into a good paying industrial job and maybe a house, boat, couple trucks and a ramshackle summer camp on a lake. Now they work gigs for people who hate them and, yeah, hate is the right word here. Snowmobiles, ATVs, 4-wheel drive trucks, etc. all became too expensive and now they are coming for the guns. Or so the paranoid story rolls out.
I was in the military for four years starting in the late 80s. Definitely a new vibe after the second Gulf War. When I was in the military, most soldiers were forbidden to wear camouflage, BDUs, off post unless they were on the way to, or from, home. I’d say people treated us slightly worse than the average bloke, certainly not better. Soldier worship is an odd twist for a nation that really did look at military service as a citizen-solider sort of thing. No more. Yeah, I see that.
Without looking up stats and going wholly on personal experience I’d say that life is much less violent than when I was growing up. At least during the 80s and early 90s life seemed grim violence wise. These days there is more violent rhetoric and personal animosity than actual violence. My hope is that this generalized paranoia and hostility won’t turn into the sort of violent crime that plagued my childhood in the deep south. Where I grew up violence was banal something to avoid if you could but, meh, it was going to happen. That’s not true now. Sure, we have school shootings but teachers don’t tell you to “take your fights off campus” as they did when I was a child. The norm has changed for the better but I worry that this new norm is hanging by a thread as the constant fear and hostility ratchet up.
I was just noticing how much junk food there is everywhere. In fact, I discovered that I go to the “health food” store solely to buy junk food. That is almost all they sell. It is labeled “organic” and comes from exotic locales but all of it is sweet, salty, fatty, etc… junk pure and simple. That trend has been ongoing all my life but I do think there was a sweet spot when high quality food was available after a period of mostly better things through science processed junk. That was about late 90s to mid-2000s.
Anti-intellectualism and a nearly complete inability for self-reflection seems increasingly normal. As a child, I met plenty of adult working class intellectuals. People who contemplated themselves and the world deeply, read widely and were open to new ideas even as while holding down dull working class jobs requiring little formal education. Many of them were part of the local Society for Creative Anachronism or played very detailed historically based roleplaying games among other pastimes I never run into anymore e.g. learning Esperanto to speak with someone on HAM radio. Never see people like that now, they must be out there though. I see intellectuals at the university where I work, professional intellectuals, and then there are the masses of bored, hostile, uninterested humanity.
Lack of ability to sit comfortably with ambiguity is also common. I see it in the undergrads I teach who want to take an historical idea and either adopt it or toss it without spending any time looking at the strengths, weaknesses and personalities involved. Sitting with the ambiguity seems to make them anxious or even angry.
Noisy cars are everywhere. In rural Maine we have the roaring monster trucks and ATVs that run night and day including intrusions into yards and driveways if not confronted. All driving nowhere, just milling about doing as much damage to the road and environment as possible. When confronted, I find most of them so high or drunk they can barely put three words together. These nuts existed in my childhood but were relegated to fringe areas now they are everywhere rural, urban, suburban… all over.
I lived in S. Korea and I’d say they are every bit as committed to work, children and getting ahead but sans monster trucks, gun worship, constant hostility and actual violence.
In my view socialization is everything, people are everything. With socialized people anything is possible. The U.S. does an awful job at socialization because we are apparently fundamentally opposed to it. Many of our institutions by design or otherwise create predatory individualists. The cult of individualism seems to be the order of the day right, left and center of the political spectrum. If some collective interest is acknowledged it is usually in the form of nationalism or a zero sum struggle between opposed and yet perhaps overlapping cultural identities. Communists and socialists we are not. Nor, despite the rhetoric, do I think we are Anarchists with any relationship to the great trends in historical Anarchism.
One question I have is why all the violence and hostility. I have been in war zones, actual contested turf, that I felt than locations in the U.S.. I struggle to explain why most of my neighbors are angry and armed 24/7. The actual rate of violence here is actually quite low and most gun violence is accidental or self-directed albeit there is a lot of that. As a Marxist I look at economic issues and at systems of oppression but I remain mystified. Poverty is part of it but many of them are at least as wealthy as I am and their hostility is always aimed at each other and rarely contemplates bosses or elites. Why are they angry all the time? I have seen no academic answer that makes sense on the ground. Life would be relatively good, even without economic change, if the people around me were just nicer or at least not aggressively awful.
For a pick me up try watching episodes of Old Enough on Netflix. Toddlers doing errands in busy cities and rural environments without much fear or danger. https://www.netflix.com/title/81506279
The show is clearly contrived but I have lived in places where this would have been possible or at least someone would have picked up the toddler and delivered him or her safely home before things got out of hand. I believe this world is possible right here where I live but to get there the U.S. needs to address the horror that we have co-created. A world unsafe and unpleasant for fully capable adults much less toddlers. We will not be able to organize ourselves into a working civil society if we continue to accept and co-create an environment that is hostile, paranoid and antisocial.
I welcome the recent trend in labor organizing and hope this is a sign of change. The world can be different and better, it is different in other places and was different here in the past. Some trends have been good but as Americans we need to accept that fact that we are not yet creating the sorts of environments we want to live in. What environment will we create and accept? A world where toddlers safely run errands and deal with strangers in complex social environments or a predatory world of armed individuals. I still believe a better world is possible I lived there not that long ago in the U.S. and Asia.
"strange people and languages". Yeah, won't somebody please think of the racists.